The Legend Of Harry Zolneircyzk's Last Name

Harry Z in one of the few times he wasn't laying on the ice after falling

During the off season General Manager Ray Shero traded for one Harry Zolniercyzk in exchange for some low level prospect.  Pens fans will mostly remember Zolniercyzk from his time with the Philadelphia Flyers....Or his kiddie porn felony or whatever.  Typing out Zolniercyzk is a very daunting task.  It take time and patience to do.  If you have been following me or Andrew all season we've resorted to calling him Harry Keysmash because that's what his last name looks like.  Something you would type after some big goal in OT or an unreal goal by Best In The World.  What most people don't know is the story behind the last name Zolniercyzk.  But now we here at Heyyyyy Fannnssss have received insider information on the origin of the last name Zolniercyzk from a very very reputable source who would like to remain anonymous. So here you go the legend of the last name Zolniercyzk...

Via very reputable source:  "The last name Zolniercyzk is very bizarre.  It looks like something you would get if you randomly bashed you face off the keyboard.  What would you say if I told you that may be exactly how the name game about?  Well back in the old days when people were being handed out first and last names, yes, that's how it happened, the Zolniercyzk clan was the last clan to receive their names.  They wanted something different.  The didn't want a normal name like "Smith" or "Johnson".  How weird would that sound.  Harry Smith or Harry John....I digress.  Anyways.  Like I said.  They wanted something different.  Something unique.  They came up with the name Zolniercyzk.  Except, that's not how they wanted it spelled.  They originally wanted it to be spelled "Zolnerchek".  The thing was, the idiot that was spelling the names kept spelling it wrong.  He would spell it "Zolnerchuk" then "Zolnirchek" and also "Zolneerchuk".  Every time they kept going back to him saying it was spelled wrong and they didn't like it.  He got so frustrated with the Zolniercyzk clan that he bashed his face off his type writer repeatedly and out came Zolniercyzk.  He gave it to them and said "This is what you get.  Now leave me alone."  They Zolniercyzk clan looked at it and said "This is gonna annoy a lot of people in the future.  Lets roll with it.""

So there lies the truth behind the last name Zolniercyzk.  Remember.  This is all fact from a very reputable source.

This is also what happens when the Pens have 37428765839 days off between games.  People send you information like this.

;)

Pens host the Isles in like 359359504 days.  

Go Pens