Friday, December 30, 2011

RECAP. We Salute You. Pens LOSE

Double J scored and gave the front row the salute.  That's all you need to know.

Devils tomorrow at 3:00 or something like that.

Go Pens

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Flyers at Pens

Unlimited talk on Al Gore's internet about the game today.

You're Welcome
If you don't know what's going on, you live under a rock.  Flyers and Pens battling for the top spot in the Atlantic, and Joe Mullen's return to Pittsburgh as a coach for Philly.

We hate John Steigerwald, but to steal a line from him "Just watch the game"

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

RECAP. Eye of the Storm. Pens WIN

Carolina rolled into town last night for their 3rd meeting with the Pens.  It was the Pens first game back from Christmas and it showed early.  Actually for about 2 and a half periods it looked like neither team knew what hockey was.

1st Period

2nd Period

3rd Period
Stuff finally started happening.  The Pens got a power play and Steve Sullivan launched a bomb passed Peters to make it 2-1 Pens.  Then Tyler Kennedy and Pascal Dupuis went in on a 2 on 1 aND TK hit Duper with a pass and Duper buried it to make it 3-1 Pens.  Jordan Staal would add another later to make it 4-1 Pens.  Carolina scored late to try and start a comeback but MAF was having none of it.  Game.

3 Stars
1.  Jordan Staal
2,  James Neal
3.  Tyler Kennedy

James Neal had 22 goals last season.  He already has 21 this season.  John Steigerwald thinks it steroids.

Unless you're still jerking off about the Steelers shutting out the Rams you know who the Pens play tomorrow.  We don't need to tell you.  Bring the noise tomorrow Pens fans.

Go Pens 

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

The Don Cherry Piano Desk

Possibly one of the best videos on the internet

Ways the Pens can fight the Injury Bug

It seems as if the Injury Bug has been striking the Pens with regularity the past few seasons.  This year, Martin, Letang, Bortuzzo, Orpik, Lovejoy, Strait, Crosby, Malkin, Staal, Jeffrey, Park, and others have missed time due to injury.  We've been hearing whispers on internet message boards that the Penguins training staff is mishandling these injuries and should be fired.  While we don't necessarily agree with these posters since we are not in the locker room and trust in Shero, we have formulated three ways that the Pens could help squash the injury bug.

1.  Hire Gregory House to be team doctor.

Out 2-4 weeks with an undisclosed lower body injury
Let's be honest:  players are going to get hurt playing hockey.  It's the treatment and prevention of injuries that makes the big difference.  House could probably cure Crosby's concussion by hitting him over the head with his cane a few times.

Internet hockey GMs tell us that House is a bit hesitant to leave his big time television show to pursue a career as a team doctor.  We assume that allowing him to create awkward sexual tension with Katie O'Malley during PensTV recordings could be the make or break point of the deal.

Close Enough

2.  Bugs Bunny as the new waterboy/coach/player.

The NBA sucks.  But if you were in 1st grade and didn't watch Space Jam when they wouldn't let you outside for recess because it was raining or snowing, you missed out on a big time part of childhood.

Basically the Looney Tunes and Michael Jordan were down big time at half to the Monstars, who are the basketball version of the Islanders with unlimited cheapshots.  Bugs Bunny uses his secret stuff, which is really just water, to bulk up during half time and come back and win the game.

The plan falls apart when John Steigerwald hears about the Pens recent hire.

3.  Craig Adams builds a shrine to Jobu in his locker.

Hey it worked for Pedro Cerrano.  Perhaps the added bonus could be to transfer the bad luck to other teams by inviting them over for some pregame rum.

Go Pens

Game 36 - Hurricanes at Penguins

Root Sports

The Penguins and Hurricanes meet tonight for the third time this year, having split a pair of meetings at RBC Center in Raleigh.  Both games were exciting, with the Pens storming back from a 3-0 deficit in the first game, only to lose 5-3.  The second game featured a 6-3 powerplay for Carolina to end the game, with the Pens coming out on top 3-2.  Tonight's game should be just as exciting. 

If you're bored, why not try the Staal Brothers Drinking Game

11 years ago today...


Lines from The Pensblog


Chris Kunitz - Evgeni Malkin - James Neal
Pascal Dupuis - Jordan Staal - Tyler Kennedy
Steve Sullivan - Joe Vitale - Matt Cooke
Arron Asham - Craig Adams - Jason Williams

Matt Niskanen - Brooks Orpik
Simon Despres - Zbynek Michalek
Ben Lovejoy - Alexandre Picard

Marc-Andre Fleury

Drayson Bowman - Eric Staal - Chad LaRose
Alexei Ponikarovsky - Jussi Jokinen - Tuomo Ruutu
Jiri Tlusty - Brandon Sutter - Patrick Dwyer
Andreas Nodl - Tim Brent - Anthony Stewart

Tim Gleason - Jamie McBain
Jay Harrison - Justin Faulk
Jaroslav Spacek - Bryan Allen

Justin Peters

Alexei Ponikarovsky makes his long awaited return to Pittsburgh

Go Pens

Saturday, December 24, 2011

RECAP. Taking Flight. Pens WIN

Its Christmas Eve and the last thing you want to do is read some long recap.

So this will be short sweet and to the point.

The Pens rolled into Winnipeg and shut the butt hurt, winy babies and their Fleury chants, crying about calls, and booing Malkin up.

The Pens went in and brought a 4-1 win home.

Jets fans don't know the post 1997 rules apparently.

And from us here at Heyyyyy Fannnssss, Merry Christmas and Let's Go Pens.

Friday, December 23, 2011

GAMEDAY 35. M.A.S.H @ Jets

MTS Centre

8:30 p.m  ROOT Sports

Hopefully Winnipeg doesn't decide to score 8 seconds into the game this time.  ROOT Sports might miss it.

Game probably won't start til 9:00 since we're in Canada.  

The Pens roll into Winnipeg tonight for their last game before the Christmas holiday.  This is the Pens second meeting with the Jets this season.  The Pens dropped the first meeting 2-1.  Jets fans will probably be butt hurt about something and have their panties in a bunch tonight.  Can't wait for them to boo an offsides call or something, Montreal style.  Minus the rioting of course.  The Jets are currently 9th in the East.  Wait what.  How the hell are these jokes 9th.  The Jets are 7-2-1 in their last 10.  7-2-1?  Who is this team.  Dan Bylsma will be wearing some unbelievable behind the bench tonight.

Pens lines via The Pensblog
Chris Kunitz-Evgeni Malkin-James Neal
Matt Cooke-Jordan Staal-Tyler Kennedy
Steve Sullivan-Joe Vitale-Pascal Dupuis
Jason Williams-Craig Adams-Aaron Asham

Brooks Orpik-Matt Niskanen
Simon Despres-Alexandre Picard
Ben Lovejoy-Brian Strait Zbynek Michalek

Z Returns tonight

Marc Andre Fleury

If you were busy still crying over the Steelers loss to pay attention to anything this week and are wondering where Deryk Engelland is, he's suspended.

Jets lineup via The Pensblog
Evander Kane-Alexandre Burmistrov-Blake Wheeler
Andrew Ladd-Nik Antropov-Kyle Wellwood
Tanner Glass-Jim Slater-Antti Miettinen
Tim Stapleton-Chris Thorburn-Eric Fehr

Tobias Enstrom-Dustin Byfuglien
Mark Stuart-Zach Bogosian
Johhny Oduya-Ron Hainsey

Ondrej Pavelic

No word yet on whether or not Alexandre Burmistrov is going to turn his back before he gets hit tonight.  Jackass.

Winnipeg Sucks.

Go Pens

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Engelland Suspended 3 Game

Shanahan probably got bored so he decided to suspend Engelland for 3 games.

Here is the hit in question.

A few things:

1: When are players putting themselves into a vulnerable position going to be taken into account?
2: 3 games for that?  Get real.
3: What does John Scott get for mugging Engo.  Nothing
4: Look what Kronwall did.

Kronwall didn't even have a hearing

Brendan Shanahan sucks.

Speaking of suck.  Pens/Jets tomorrow.

Go Pens

Wednesday, December 21, 2011


The Pens hosted the top standing Blackhawks Tuesday night, who were coming off a 5 game winning streak going into Pittsburgh.  Consol Energy Center gave a huge welcome back to Jordan Staal, Craig Adams and Ben Lovejoy, who joined Tuesdays line up after being out with injuries.  

1st Period
Fleury made some God like saves, like always. Ten minutes into the period, Geno makes a sick pass through center ice to Kris Kunitz who breaks away and scores the first one of the night.  The Pens continued to take shots on goal, but couldn’t find an opening.  Buzzer sounds and the Pens headed into the locker room with a 1-0 lead.

2nd Period
Less then 3 minutes into the second period, Geno makes another slick pass up the ice to a wide-open James Neal who finishes the play with one sick goal, leaving Blackhawks goaltender Emery in a daze.  Fleury continues to make numerous saves throughout the second period.   With about 3 minutes to go in the 2nd period, Lovejoy finds himself surrounded by Blackhawks and makes a short pass to a very open Tyler Kennedy who makes the best out of the situation with a quick goal.  End of the 2nd period and the Pens lead 3-0.

3rd Period
Within 6 minutes into the 3rd period, Toews and Stalberg both tallied goals for the Blackhawks.  The Penguins were on their heels the rest of the game, as the Blackhawks were giving it their all in the Penguins 3-2 lead. With less then two minutes left in the game, James Neal was sent to the penalty box for tripping, giving the Blackhawks a full advantage.  Fleury made some tough saves and the Pens defense was a solid wall, securing the 3-2 win.

Malkin assisted on all 3 of the Penguins goals Tuesday night, giving him 39 points on the season, which has him tied for 2nd place in the league.  Fleury is currently tied 2nd in the league with 17 wins on the season, trailing Red Wings goaltender Jimmy Howard.  Tuesday night’s goal gave James Neal his 19th of the season and he is now tied for second place in the league along with Toews, Kessel and Gaborik.


3. Stalberg
2. Fleury
1. Malkin

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

GAMEDAY 34. M.A.S.H vs Blackhawks

7:30 p.m.


The Blackhawks roll into town tonight for their only meeting with the Pens thins season other than pre season.  If not for injuries we would be talking about a matchup between some one the NHL's biggest stars.  We could be talking about Crosby, Malkin, Staal, Neal, Letang vs Kane, Toews, Hossa, Sharp and Seabrook.  Instead we are talking about Kane, Toews, Hossa, Sharp, and Seabrook vs Malkin, Neal....uhh...Despres?  Uhh...Yeah.  Anyway.  

A little trip down memory lane:

On this day 5 years ago the future of the Pittsburgh Penguins was in serious jeopardy.  The future of the Penguins basically relied on The Isles of Capri getting the cities slots license that was up for grabs.  It was either the Isles of Capri who would help fund a new arena for the Penguins or PITG Gaming headed by Don Barden and Jerome Bettis.  Barden and Bettis would help fund a new arena if they won the license but the would only of forked over 7.5 million dollars to the arena which wouldn't have been enough help.  As fate would have it Barden as PITG Gaming would win the slots license.  The world was at a stand still for Pens fans.  It was a real possibility that the Penguins were not getting a new arena and heading to Kansas City.  

Statement from NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman:
"The decision by the Gaming Commission was terrible news for the Penguins, their fans and the NHL. The future of this franchise in Pittsburgh is uncertain and the Penguins now will have to explore all other options, including possible relocation. The NHL will support the Penguins in their endeavors."


Probably one of the worst things to read as a Pens fan.  You saw the word RELOCATION in your sleep.  The worst part was the Pens were finally starting to play good hockey and become competitive again.  Day in and day out you were wondering what was going to happen to our beloved Penguins.  But as fate would have it in 2008 Don Barden defaulted on the Casino project.  I'd call him a jackass but he passed away in May of this year.  So we can just tell Jerome Bettis to suck it.  Oh and this happened:
The Penguins would win the game 5-4 in a shootout.

The Pensblog goes a little more in depth than we did with the story.

Fast forward to today.  5 years to they day, 2 Stanley Cup Finals appearances, and a Cup win later the Penguins take on the Chicago Blackhawks.  The Blackhawks are playing some great hockey and are currently 1st in the West.  Like we said earlier if the Pens were healthy this could be an unreal game.  But.


Pens line via The PensNation
Chris Kunitz-Evgeni Malkin-James Neal
Matt Cooke-Jordan Staal**-Tyler Kennedy
Steve Sullivan-Joe Vitale-Pascal Dupuis
Eric Tangradi-Craig Adams**-Aaron Asham

Brooks Orpik-Matt Niskanen
Simon Despres-Deryk Engelland
Alexandre Picard-Ben Lovejoy**

Marc Andre Fleury

** Game time decisions

Lines for the Blackhawks via The PensNation
Jeremy Morin-Jonathan Toews-Patrick Kane
Patrick Sharp-Marcus Kruger-Marian Hossa
Michael Frolik-Dave Bolland-Brian Bickell
Andrew Brunette-Jamal Mayers-Viktor Stalberg

Duncan Keith-Brent Seabrook
Nick Leddy- Niklas Hjalmarsson
Johnn Scott-Steve Motador

Ray Emrey.


No Dan Carcillo tonight.  What a shame.

When we first saw this game on the schedule we thought it had the potential to be a lot of fun.  But with the bizarre rash of injuries that have hit the Penguins this season our second line center on some nights has been Pascal Dupuis.  But the way Evgeni Malkin has been playing as of late the Pens have a chance to make this competitive.  And, with the 8-3 win against the Sabres the Pens are bringing some confidence into this game.  Plus, Chicago is starting Ray Emrey.

Go Pens

Welcome Chelsea to the Blog

So Steve is out for a week with an unspecified upper body injury.  There is currently no timetable for his return.

So to fill in for him during his absence our good friend from twitter Chelsea will help blog for a while until Steve returns at 100%

Be nice and giver her a follow at @flakesofFLEURY

She sent in a bunch of Crosby Watch pictures earlier this season.  So yeah.  Can you tell I'm bored?

Pens/Blackhawks tonight at 7:30

Go Pens

Sunday, December 18, 2011


Evgeni Malkin put on a show at Saturday nights home game against Buffalo, and it was simply "magic".  Two assists and a hat trick gave Malkin a 5 point night, and his hat trick was the seventh of his career.  Malkin has 36 points on the season, and is letting everyone know he means business.

Marc Andre Fleury also celebrated his 200th career NHL win Saturday night, congrats Flower!  Putting aside two of the top players Saturday, there was a huge team effort in this win.  Simon Despres celebrated his first NHL goal and Carl Sneep played his first NHL career game and had an assist.  James Neal, Jason Williams, Chris Kunitz, and Deryk Engelland also chipped in goals leading to the Pens victory.  

3. Fleury
2. Despres
1. Malkin

Craig Adams left the the game in the second period, where he was later reported to have a "lower body injury" and is day to day with his return.  Just no more concussions or injuries, please.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

GAMEDAY 33. M.A.S.H vs Sabres

7:00 p.m.

ROOT Sports

The Pens are a mess right now.  Jason Williams and Carl Sneep were called up today.  

No Paul Mart or Jordan Staal tonight

The Pens are basically throwing a line up full of Wilkes Barre players on the ice tonight.

Fun times.

Go Pens.

RECAP. Defenseless. Pens LOSE

The Pens were in Ottawa for their 2nd meeting of the year with the Sens.

Remember when the Pens played defense?

Better question...Remember what it was like to have a healthy roster.

1st Period

2nd Period
Business finally decided to pick up.  Sens scored 25 seconds into the period.  Sullivan answer a few seconds later.  The Sens would add 2 quick ones to make it 3-1.  The the Pens finally were able to cash in on the power play after failing on their last 32943025879 attempts.  Niskanen would make it 3-2 and Malkin would tie the game at 3.  For as much as we've jobbed Niskanen in the past we will admit he has been one of the best players this season.  The Sens would take the lead for good when they added 2 more in the 2nd to make it 5-3.

3rd Period
Pens would pull Johnny to start the 3rd.  Malkin would have a shot at a wide open net but it was blocked by someone.  Kind of sums up the night.  Sens would tack on another to make it 6-3.  Pens would get one back but it was too late.  

Paul Martin

Martin collided with someone and fell awkwardly in the 3rd.  Tried to come back to the game but couldn't go.  Officially listed as a lower body injury.

Neal took a high stick or something but returned to the game

3 Stars
1. L O L

No rest for the Pens.  Buffalo come to town in 0.223 seconds.

Fun times.

Go Pens

Friday, December 16, 2011

Game 32 - Pens at Sens

ROOT Sports - What will we miss?

Did Ottawa just decide to build their arena in a field somewhere?  No idea.

The Pens injury situation is bizarre right now.  Not even going to try to preview this because this team is a hot mess. 

Really have a lot of hate for Ottawa having played them in 3 of last 5 playoffs.  And Bryan Murray is an ass.

Here's the video.  No idea how to embed it

Also, say hello to an old friend....

Go Pens

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

RECAP. ROOT Sports Sucks. Pens LOSE

We needed to blame this loss on someone.

Normal blogging resumes Friday.  Pens head to Ottawa.

Fuck Finals

Go Pens

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Game 31 - Red Wings at Penguins

The blog is currently day to day with an undisclosed ailment.

AKA It's finals week

Sunday, December 11, 2011


That title have less than 0 relevance to the game.  We just need an excuse to us it.

The Pens traveled to Long Island last night to take on the Islanders for the 4th time already this season, and just like the others the Pens took it to the Isles.  Although it didn't look so good early.

The Islanders jumped out to an early lead when some kid scored his first NHL goal or something.  MAF played it horribly.

Someone made it 2-0.  Looks like the Pens weren't going to show up again.

But Sullivan scored scored to make it 2-1 and James Neal scored to tie the game right before intermission.

The Isles took the lead in the 2nd when Okposo sniped MAF to make it 3-2.  That's the last lead the Islols would have.

James Neal would tie it and the flood gates opened.

Dupuis would add one one in the 2nd and Cooke annnnnnnnnnnnnd PAUL MARTIN would score in thr 3rd to give the Pens the 6-3 win.

The Islolaners are awful

Red Wings on Tuesday.

Go Pens

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Game 30 - Penguins at IsLOLanders

ROOT Sports - video
Paul Steigerwald - commentary on God knows what

If you're a parent and your kid comes home from college with a boyfriend or girlfriend from Long Island you probably want to spare yourself from the unpleasantness, ego, and general disregard for the rules that comes with it.  The Islanders, being from Long Island, are no different.  Absolutely garbage franchise, garbage organization, and garbage players within the system like Trevor Gillies and John Tavares.

The Pens have more injuries than a MASH unit right now.  Michalek, Letang, Crosby, Staal, Jeffrey, and Park at least will all miss the game.  Really not sure what to expect from the WBS callups.  




Friday, December 9, 2011

RECAP. No show's...again. Pens LOSE

The Pens made their first trip into Philly last night.  Yeah.

The Pens spent the first half of the game vomiting all over themselves, eating it, then vomiting all over themselves again.  The Pens really didn't show up until James Neal put one in Bryzgalov's eye.  But they put themselves in a 3-0 whole they just couldn't get out of.

2 points night for Malkin

Bortuzzo took a head shot, left the game and didn't return.

Fuck off.

Isles on Saturday.

Zac Rinaldo sucks

Go Pens

Thursday, December 8, 2011

GAMEDAY 29. Pens @ Flyers

7:00 p.m.
ROOT Sports

Rumor is that picture was taken in May.  Still awaiting confirmation.

The Pens make their 1st trip into Philadelphia this season for their 1st match up with the Flyers.  You all remember what happened this off season unless you were in a corner crying becasue their might not be any football.  If you're watching the Steelers tonight stop reading this post and turn in your fan card.  You can chirp us for that last sentence.  We won't lose any sleep over it.  

Max Talbot is a Flyer too

This is the Flyers need we say more.

Old School Youtube city

Pens lines via The Pensblog
Steve Sullivan-Evgeni Malkin-James Neal
Chrisk Kunitz-Jordan Staal-Tyler Kennedy
Matt Cooke-Joe Vitale-Pascal Dupuis
Aaron Asham-Craig Adams-Steve MacIntyre

Robert Bortuzzo-Brooks Orpik
Simon Despres- Paul Martin
Alexandre Picard- Matt Niskanen

Marc Andre Fleury

Remember what it felt like to have everyone healthy?
Sidney Crosby will miss at least the next 2 games as a precaution

Flyers lines via The Pensblog
Scott Hartnell-Claude Giroux-Jamior Jagr
James Van Riemsdyk-Daniel Briere-Wayne Simmonds
Matt Reed-Maxime Talbot-JakubVoracek
Harry Zoinerczyk-Sean Courtier-Zac Rinaldo

Kimmo Timonen-Brayden Couburn
Matt Carle-Marc-Andre Bourdon
Andrej Meszaros-Kevin Marshall

Ilya Bryzgalov

Flyers beat Buffalo in overtime last night so they might be a little tired.  Claude Giroux is on a tear this season and Double J isn't doing to bad himself.  Its always a good time when the Pens play the Flyers and its even better when the walk into Philadelphia and bring home 2 points.

Let's Roll


Go Pens

Wednesday, December 7, 2011


So you may heard a couple days ago the NHL announced its new realignment for next season.  Only reason they had to do this was because of the Atlanta Thrashers move to Winnipeg.  Winnipeg is currently in the Southeast Division.  Yeah that just doesn't work.  So the NHL had to realign the conferences.  There are now 4 conferences.  2 with 8 teams and 2 with 7 teams.  Instead of moving swapping Winnipeg with Nashville, Detroit, or Columbus (the 3 western conference teams that are furthest east) the NHL decided to make 4 Conferences.  The names of the conferences are still undetermined, although there are unconfirmed rumors the NHL wants to get corporations to sponsor them.

 Here is a picture of the new conferences:

If your having trouble reading that here is basically what is says.

Conference 1 (Orange)
  • Edmonton
  • Calgary
  • Vancouver
  • Colorado
  • San Jose
  • Anaheim
  • Phoenix
  • Los Angeles
Conference 2 (Yellow)
  • Winnipeg
  • Minnesota
  • Detroit
  • Chicago
  • Columbus
  • St. Louis
  • Nashville
  • Dallas
Conference 3 (Blue)
  • Montreal
  • Ottawa
  • Toronto
  • Buffalo
  • Boston
  • Tampa Bay  <----- BONED
  • Florida  <----- SUPER BONED
Conference 4 (Green)
  • Pittsburgh
  • Philadelphia
  • Washington
  • New York Rangers
  • New York Islanders
  • New Jersey
  • Carolina
What this all means.
  • Pens stay in the same division as Philly which was a big thing for the NHL to keep
  • Washington moves into the Pens division
  • Florida and Tampa Bay are screwed for travel
  • Playoff format is changed
  • Teams will play non conference opponents in a home and home.  Then fill out the schedule with conference games
New Playoff Format
  • No more 1 through 8 seeds
  • Seeds will be 1-4 with in your conference
  • 1 team from each conference make the final 4.
  • Teams will be re-seeded in the final 4.
What that all means
  • Pens could play Philly and Washington in the 1st 2 rounds.
  • Pens could play Vancouver in the semi-finals
  • Pens could play Montreal or Boston for the Cup.
Basically you have a chance to play anyone who isn't in your teams conference for the cup.

Realignment Winners
  • Pittsburgh, Philly, Washington.
Pens keep their rivalry with the Flyers, Rangers, and Islanders.  
Flyers stay in the same division as the Pens
An old Patrick Division rivalry returns.  Pittsburgh and Washington.  Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.  If you don't understand just go back to 91 and watch every Pens/Caps playoff series.

Realignment Losers
  • Tampa Bay and Florida
Tampa Bay and Florida got FUCKED and fucked hard.  They are in a division with 3 Canadian teams as opposed to only 1 this season.  (Winnipeg)  Their closest away conference game is Buffalo.  Their closest away non conference game, Nashville.  If anyone hates realignment its Florida and Tampa.  Maybe Ryan Malone will cry about it.

So there you have it.  You'll probably get confused reading this post but oh well.

If any of the like 6 people that read this blog have any suggestions for names for the conference leave a comment in here or send us a tweet at @HF_Steve and @SidsAFerrari and we'll post our favorites.  (If we get enough)

Flyers tomorrow at 7.  Get your mind right.  

Go Pens.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Alexander Ovechkin's drop off. Our take.

So in case you are living under a rock or are just paying attention to hockey now you know that Alexander Ovechkin has had a drop off in production.  In case you don't believe us go look at the points leaders.  

Alex Ovechkin currently sits 67th in the league in points.  That's right 67th.  AO usually have about 23 goals by this point of the season.  Maybe that's an exaggeration but you get the point.  He currently has 8 goals 11 assists for 19 points.  Some of the people with more points than AO are (Does not include people with same amount of points as Ovechkin):
  • Vinny Prospal.  20 points
  • Shawn Horcoff.  20 points
  • Marc-Andre Bergeron.  21 points
  • P.A. Parenteau.  21 points
  • Ryan O'Reilly.  21 points
  • Valtteri Filppula.  21 points
  • Craig Smith.  21 points
  • Jamior Jagr.  21 points
  • Pascal Dupuis.  21 points
  • Tomas Plekanec 21 points
  • Scott Hartnell.  22 points
  • Brian Campbell.  23 points
  • Erik Karlsson.  23 points
  • Jamie Benn.  23 points
  • Ray Whitney.  23 points
  • Jeff Skinner.  23 points
  • Radim Vrbata.  23 points
  • Tyler Seguin.  25 points
  • Ryan Smyth.  26 points
  • Jason Pominville.  27 points
  • Jordan Eberle.  28 points
  • Kris Versteeg.  28 points
  • Tomas Fleischmann.  28 points
  • Stephen Weiss.  29 points
  • Ryan Nugent-Hopkins.  29 points
  • Joffrey Lupul.  31 points
  • Phil Kessel.  34 points (League Leader)
We mention Phil Kessel because we all know what happened at the All-Star game last year.

Who's laughing now.

But for all we know Ovi could go off the rest of the season who knows. 

In case you missed it John Steigerwald said Ovi isn't taking steroids anymore.  He also had a spat with Ruck Daddy's Ryan Lambert today.

So here's our thoughts on Ovi.

We don't know if he has or has not taken steroids.  We aren't going to speculate either.  As much as we don't like AO we will admit he is one hell of a player.  But why the sudden drop off in point total.  I (Brandon) personally think it's because teams are finally learning how to defend him.  In years prior AO would go screaming down the left wing, cut to the slot, then rip one passed the goalie.  Team would basically back away from him and give him all the room in the world.  Don't know how many time I've seen Caps highlights and its AO cutting to the middle and launching a bomb into the net.  Pretty sure 9 out of 10 NHLer's would score if given an open shot in the slot.  Now teams are stepping up on him and not giving him the room to cut to the middle of the ice and rip a slap shot top shelf.  The Pens played the Caps the other day and every time AO had the puck someone was stepping up on him and not giving him the room to shoot.  Now AO is having to create different shots for himself and he's not getting the chances he usually gets or wants.  Hence the drop off in production.

I (Steve) think it is a combination of what Brandon said and Ovechkin's  trying to be more defensively responsible.  Never was his game, and never will be.  He also is appeared to be more interested in cars and women than winning games.  It definitely isn't good for the league for him to drop off like this.  And if the roid accusations are true, the last thing the league needs right now is a scandal, so we hope they aren't

RECAP. Tim Thomas. Pens LOSE

*This is the #SheroBucks post*  Good Luck

The defending Stanley Cup Champions rolled on into the Consol Energy Center last night and we are still waiting if the Pens showed up yet.  The Pens looked like crap all game and wasted 2 fairly long 5 on 3's.  One of which being for a full 2 minutes.  Don't even know how to recap this.

1st Period

This was basically every period for the Pens last night.  Really not much else to say.  Bruins looked to have gotten on the board first but it was waived off.  Only other highlight of the period was Dan Bylsma making a leaping catch on a puck heading into the crowd.  Clearly Bylsma is a dick.  I mean who does that?

If you don't have sarcasm detector stop reading this.

2nd Period
Greg Campbell scored early to make it 1-0 Bruins.  Then Brad Marchand hit Niskanen with a slew foot.  Marchand should have been kicked out of the game but wasn't  Niskanen didn't take a retaliation penalty and ended up fighting Marchand.  Pens would get their first 5 on 3 of the game when Chara just ran over James Neal in front of Tim Thomas.  Pens couldn't do anything with it and soon after the penalties were over Pouliot beat MAF to make it 2-0 Bruins.  The Pens would get another 5 on 3 near the end of the period.  This one would be for a full 2 minutes.  For some God forsaken reason Sidney Crosby is playing the LEFT point on the power play.  No clue why is isn't on the half wall so he can launch one-timers.  Bruins killed it.

3rd Period
3rd period was more of the same.  Tyler Seguin scored early to make it 3-0.  Game over.  Even though the Pens it to kind of woke up after Matt Cooke scored to bring 3-1 Bruins.  Joe Vitale ended up getting into a fight with someone and you felt like the Pens could actually get back into it.  Then the wheels started to fall off.  Crosby and Kunitz crashed into each other sending Crosby hobbling to the bench.  He would return to the game.  Then Malkin got hit by Danny Paille and their heads hit and Pallie has a cage on his helmet which hit Malkin on the face.  What a shitty game.


Tim Thomas should have gotten all 3 stars.

Quick Thoughts

  • Jordan Staal looked bad.
  • Joe Vitale was probably the best player on the ice for the Pens last night
  • Tim Thomas
  • Niskanen has been solid this year
  • Realignment post coming later
  • How unreal has Kunitz been this year.  Violent player 
Pens better show up Thursday.  You know who they play.  If you don't...go keep jerking off to the Steelers ad stay off the bandwagon.

Go Pens

Monday, December 5, 2011

Game 28 - Bruins at Penguins

ROOT Sports

The Bruins come into town tonight to face YOUR PITTTTSSSSSSBUUURRRRRGGGGGHHHHH PANG WINS.  The Pens and Bruins come in one and two in the East respectively, so this could be a potential second or third round playoff matchup. 

Several underlying themes in this game, concussions being one of them.  If you're reading this blog you probably know about the Cooke/Savard incident.  Perhaps what you don't know is that Crosby and Patrice Bergeron, for lack of better terms, are somewhat "concussion brothers."  Both missed significant time with concussions, and Bergeron actually gave support to Crosby during his dark days.

The Bruins always bring an entertaining game when they play the Pens.  With the teams owning two of the last three Stanley Cups between them, that should be the case tonight, despite the Pens injury situation.

LINES (from Empty Netters)

Chris Kunitz - Sidney Crosby - Pascal Dupuis
Steve Sullivan - Evgeni Malkin - James Neal
Matt Cooke - Jordan Staal - Tyler Kennedy
Arron Asham - Richard Park - Craig Adams

Matt Niskanen - Brooks Orpik
Paul Martin - Deryk Engelland
Simon Despres  - Robert Bortuzzo

Marc-Andre Fleury


Milan Lucic - David Krejci - Nathan Horton
Brad Marchand - Patrice Bergeron - Tyler Seguin
Benoit Pouliot - Chris Kelly - Rich Peverley
Daniel Paille - Gregory Campbell - Shawn Thornton

Zdeno Chara - Johnny Boychuk
Dennis Seidenberg - Joe Corvo
Andrew Ference - Adam McQuaid

Tim Thomas

Need more CorvoFace.  GO PENS

Sunday, December 4, 2011

RECAP. Killed Off. Pens WIN

Pens made their second trip to Carolina last night to take on the Hurricanes hoping for a different result then last time.  They would get it.

Not much happened in the 1st period.

Craig Adams got the Pens on the board first after he one timed a Sidney Crosby pass past Brian Boucher to make it 1-0 Pens.

Fun Fact.  The Pens are now 6-1 after last night when Craig Adams scores a goal.  (Not including playoffs)

Carolina tied it late in the 2nd on a delayed penalty call.

Then in the 3rd Fulton Reed...I mean Aaron Asham launched a bomb that beat Boucher to make it 2-1 Pens.

Later Pascal Dupuis would score to get get his like 23425 point this season to make it 3-1 Pens.

It looked as if James Neal made it 4-1 Pens but the goal was waived off because Malkin "interfered" with Boucher.

The Cane would score another to bring the scored to 3-2.

The Pens would have to kill off a 5 on 3 with under 2 minutes left.  It would eventually become a 6 on 3 when Carolina pulled Boucher.  Neither team would get anything and Johnny had to make a spectacular save to keep the lead for the Pens.  The Pens would hold on to win 3-2.

Quick Thoughts

  • Simon Despres is playing some good hockey.
  • Paul Martin had a solid game last night.
  • Staal and Engelland both got hurt during the game.
Bruins Flyers Isles and Wangs up next.  Unlimited hate coming through.

Go Pens

Friday, December 2, 2011

RECAP. That was..."righteous". Pens WIN

The Pens made their first trip into Washington last night.  It was the Pens second meeting with the Caps and the first meeting since the Caps hired Dale Hunter as coach.  Pretty sure Dale Hunter's "system" is to commit horrible turnovers, fall everywhere, and miss the net constantly.  No clue what the Caps were doing last night.  For a Pens/Caps game this was probably the most boring one in a looooooooooooooooong time.  

1st Period
Pens hit a couple post early.  Pretty sure the Caps had no clue the game even started.  The Asham threw a puck right through Vokoun's asshole right to Craig Fuckin Adams and CFA puts it home to make it 1-0 Pens.  Wonder what the Pens record is when CFA scores.  20 bucks to whoever figures it out.  Then on the ensuing face off Asham fought Erskine.  Pretty good fight.  Finally woke the Caps up.  They had a few decent chances but MAF's sac was everywhere.  Pens got a power play someone in there that they did nothing with.  Asham both got robbed by Vokoun somewhere in the first too.

2nd Period
Caps tied the game early in the 2nd after Niskanen got out worked going back for an icing.  Pens went back to the power play.  Yeah.  Then the Pens went off sides on an odd man rush.  Pens have to lead the league in off side's this season.  Caps had a few power plays but couldn't do anything with them.  2nd period was zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz city.

3rd Period
Pens had a power play to start the 3rd that carried over from the 2nd.  Watching the power play was like watching 5 Penguins try to hump a hockey puck.  Shortly after the power play Chris Kunitz out worked everyone and stayed with the puck then beat Vokoun to make it 2-1 Pens.  Simon Despres would get his first NHL assist on the play.  Vokoun probably made the worst attempt at a save ever.  Probably the only goalie that gets beat by that shot is him.  Not much else happened in the 3rd except for Vokoun robbing Orpik.  The Caps would eventually pull Vokoun but the Pens basically just toyed with the Caps and didn't let the Caps get the puck.  GAME.  OVER.

Pens win 2-1.

3 Stars
1. Paul Martin
2. Jason Chimera
3.  Alexander Ovechkin

Who ever picked the 3 stars had to have been higher than a god damn plane.  Jesus

Near the end of the game John Carlson elbowed Matt Cooke in the head.  Here's the video.
Of course Carlson isn't going to have a hearing about it.  Can anyone say double standard.  
John Carlson sucks.

Quick Thoughts
  • Very solid game from Bortuzzo and Despres
  • Pens out shot the Caps by like 2i3u5y4457y shots
  • MAF was solid all game.  Played the puck very well
  • Not quite sure Dale Hunter know's how to coach
  • Caps are a mess.
Pens head to Jeff Skinner's sad box tomorrow at 7.

Go Pens


Thursday, December 1, 2011

Game 26 - Penguins at Crapitals

ROOT Sports

The Penguins and Capitals face off for the second time this season.  A few big storylines are in play tonight.  It is Sidney Crosby's first game back against the Capitals since the injury.  Dale Hunter is coaching his second game for the Capitals since BBQ Bruce was fired on Monday.  And someone on the Caps is probably going to try to avenge Jay Beagle for not knowing how to fight.

Caps fans are making out with themselves over hiring Dale Hunter and firing BBQ Bruce.  Most Capitals fans were surprised to hear Hunter actually played for the Capitals in the 90s, because most didn't know hockey existed then.  They're already drawing comparisons to the Pens situation with Bylsma in 2009, but think Hunter will be better because he was such a good player, at least according to Texas Ted.

Wayne Gretzky was pretty good at hockey too.  He later went on to coach the Phoenix Coyotes to the bottom of the West, his wife lost a ton gambling on the team or something, and he is now so desperate for attention that he has appeared in Nickelback videos and joined the Twitter Police.

Last time these two teams played, the Caps got two fluky goals and the game went to overtime, where they won on a powerplay goal (Side note:  remember when they said overtime powerplays were unfair?).  The Pens dominated ever facet of the game, and Vokoun, like usual, crapped his pants late on Neal's tying goal.  Tonight, however, the Pens are missing Kris Letang and Zybnek Michalek.  Welcome to the NHL Simon Despres



Chris Kunitz - Sidney Crosby - Pascal Dupuis
Steve Sullivan - Evgeni Malkin - James Neal
Matt Cooke - Jordan Staal - Tyler Kennedy
Arron Asham - Joe Vitale - Craig Adams

Matt Niskanen - Brooks Orpik
Paul Martin - Deryk Engelland
Simon Despres  - Robert Bortuzzo

Marc-Andre Fleury


Alex Ovechkin - Nicklas Backstrom - Troy Brouwer
Cody Eakin - Marcus Johansson - Alexander Semin
Jason Chimera - Brooks Laich - Joel Ward
Matt Hendricks - Jeff Halpern - Mike Knuble

Karl Alzner - John Carlson
John Erksin - Dennis Wideman
Roman Hamrlik - Dmitry Orlov

Knuble on the 4th line hahahahahah

In case you missed it

In case you went to sleep like a normal human being last night you missed some fun stuff.

Dan Bylsma probably went to bed at a normal time like a regular human.  That probably makes him Satan to Caps fan.


Some Caps blog wrote a "pre-game" last night.

We aren't going to go into it again so here is our post about it from late last night.

HEYYYYY FANNNSSSS: A Caps/Pens "pre game"

Have fun going through that.

And fuckin guess who's fuckin back!!!!!

In case that wasn't enough for you its good ol Bruce Boudreau.  Last night after a 4-1 win over Montreal the Anaheim Duck fired coach Randy Carlyle and hired former Caps coach Bruce Boudreau.  Guess all the OMG BOBBY RYAN MIGHT GET TRADED rumors can stop now.  Welcome back Bruce.

Caps tonight at 7.  Let's Go.

Go Pens