Sunday, January 25, 2015

HF Boards: Random Trades

I was gonna wait until we launched the Pens of Anarchy site to do another HF Boards post, but I just so happen to have found the WORST trade in HF Boards history. Naturally, with the worst trade in HF Boards history and the All-Star game, it was a boring weekend so I figured we could fill it up with some fun.

In case you're new to following us here at PoA (formerly known as Heyyyyy Fannnssss) we like to make fun of the biggest degenerates on the internet and those degenerates occupy the space known as HFBoards.com. Yes, we know some of you might consider the Die Hard Penguins facebook page to have some of the biggest degenerates on the internet, but if you think they do, you need to broaden your horizons and travel the world wide web further because you'll lose even more brain cells if you read the posts at HF.  What we like to do is compile a bunch of dumbass trade proposals from those idiots into one post and just roast them. This post will kind of be like a Comedy Central Roast of *insert Celebrity name here* but we are far from being comedians and the people we are roasting are farrrrrr from being celebrities.


The Jam Siren means it's go time.

Trade #1 - the WORST trade in HF boards history (for those of you who red the HF boards or have followed along with our posts know that this must be reallyyyyy bad)


Paul Martin (25% salary retained)
Beau Bennett
2016 Conditional 3rd Round Pick (2nd if Martin re-signs) (yeah I know...)


Mike Green


Yes, that Mike Green.... 

No need to honestly even analyze this trade as 1. It'll never happen 2. The guy who wrote this probably should have his internet rights revoked for 3 years forever.

Yikes


Trade #2 - I guess an Oilers fan wants to make another deal with GMJR.


Brandon Sutter
Derrick Pouliot
Rob Scuderi

PIT 2015 1st
Derek Roy
Teddy Purcell (50% retained)
Jeff Petry

GOOD GOD NO. There's no way that if the Penguins were to trade Brandon Sutter and Derrick Pouliot to Edmonton, they would have to Yakupov, Eberle, or Taylor Hall in return so yeah thats' all we even need to say.



GMJR when MacT would call with this trade, probably.

Trade #3. This is a 3 way deal between the Penguins, Kings, and Senators.



Marc Methot

Paul Martin

LA Kings 2015 2nd
LA Kings 2016 3rd
Joel Lowry

Uhhhhh so essentially the Penguins are trading Paul Martin for Marc Methot. TBH, I forgot the Ottawa Senators existed. Uhhhhh yeahhhh

Trade #4 - A trade with the Panthers. This outta be good.




Sean Bergenheim



Robert Bortuzzo
Nick Spaling
Brian Dumoulin

Uhhhhh, that's pretty steep for Sean god damn Bergenheim


Trade #5 - This trade was made by the same guy who made the Mike Green trade so take it with a grain of salt...


Brad Marchand


Paul Martin
Scott Harrington
Jean Sebastien-Dea
2016 2nd

No, no, no, no, no, no.




Well we can only make fun of so many degenerates at once. We hope you enjoy this one and we will have some more of this as the takes are gonna start to be hotter as we get closer to the trade deadline in March.


Until then.

Go Pens.




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