Tuesday, May 20, 2014

State Of The Penguins Address.

*Warning: This post depicts our views as armchair GMs.  If you aren't into that sort of stuff, well. 
 Viewer discretion is advised.

The Penguins are a mess.  Plain and simple.  No sugar coating it.  No way around it.  No hiding it.  They are a mess whether you want to admit it or not.  "But they've made the playoffs 9 years in a row!!!111!!!11!"  Ok well how many times have they been to the Finals since 09?  If we could use one picture to describe the current state of the Pens it would be this one: 

If we wanted to take time and use photo shop we would have photo shopped David Morehouse's head and a Pens logo onto the picture below and used it:
 

But we are too lazy.  If anyone wants to do that for us though we'll give you a high five and a shout out on twitter or something.  Maybe even 5 bucks.  Anyways back to the Pens.  Since 09 this team has bowed out of the playoffs in the 2nd, 1st, 1st, 3rd, and 2nd rounds.  3 of those rounds they led in the series.  2 of them they were up 3-1.  1 of them they were swept.  1 they were embarrassed by the Flyers.  The Penguins now are turning into what the Washington Capitals were.  A regular season juggernaut followed by a playoff flameout.  It's become frustrating.  It's become infuriating.  You watch this team all season and they give the false hope that this could be the year, especially the last 2, only to fall flat on their faces.  The 4 of us that contribute to the blog were all at game of the Rangers series this year.  I can't speak for Zack or Nate but I know Andrew and I sat in the arena just starring.  At the ice.  The ceiling.  Our rally towels.  Disappointed, angry, and quite frankly fed up with the garbage we had just watched and have become accustomed to for the past 5 season.  The Penguins need change and they need it NOW.

The Pens need change in attitude.  This team and organization have become soft.  They, like Mario Lemieux put it, lack grit and character.  They need to change from top to bottom.  They've started that change by firing Ray Shero.  But that's not enough.  They need to continue that change going forward or else we will be right back here next year, pissed off at another Penguins flameout.  But what else can the Pens do to change?   *Here is the part you anti arm chair GMs should probably stop reading.  

Here are 5 things the Pens need to do to push that change and make this team better moving forward.

1. Fire Dan Bylsma.  This should have been done already.  If you would have asked Pens fans last Friday who they would have taken, Bylsma or Shero, most of them would have taken Shero and fired Bylsma.  The few that said keep Bylsma and fire Shero probably would have used "Bylsma won a cup" as their reason.  Regardless the Pens need change behind the bench.  Dan Bylsma has lost this team and the book is out on how to beat his system.  And he is too stubborn to adjust and make changes when his system gets shut down.  It's his way and no one is gonna tell him otherwise.  Dan Bylsma has got to go or have fun with flaming out in the 2nd round every year.

2. Shoot David Morehouse.  Most of you will probably be like "wtf?"  Well listen up.  David Morehouse is a jack ass.  Plain and simple.  And this jack ass wants to have a bigger role in the Pens hockey operations.  This should scare you.  Quite frankly it terrifies us.  We could go into it but we don't have the time to dig a bunch of shit up.  So instead read this post on David Morehouse that our good friends at the Pensblog wrote yesterday.  You can find it HERE.  Frightened yet?

3. The Roster. The makeup of the Pens roster needs to change.  Big time.  Let's start with the UFAs.  F all of them.  Don't resign a single one.  Brooks Orpik is washed up and can barely go anymore.  F Matt Niskanen.  He's a locker room cancer and quite frankly he sucks.  Let him go get 6 million a year from Buffalo.  F the rest of the UFAs.  They really aren't even worth listing.  Now the RFAs.  Brandon Sutter and Simon Despres.  Resign both of them.  Brandon Sutter played some of his best hockey after the trade deadline.  He was a force in the playoffs.  He was the Pens bottom 6 last year.  Plus.  He's only gonna get better.  Bring him back.  We'll get to Simon Despres a bit later but we wouldn't think twice about resigning him.  Also.  You have to extend Marc Andre Fleury this Summer.  He exercised his playoff demons this season and was the big reason the Pens had any chance at being 1 win away from the Eastern Conference Finals.  He has 1 year left on his current deal but still.  Extend him this Summer.  He's earned it.  Also.  F Craig Adams.  He's another locker room cancer that brings nothing to this team at all.  F him.  You also have to make a trade or two.  Only player we would have no problem trading, (For the right price), is James Neal.  Before you say "HE'S DA ONLY SCORING WINGER WE HAVE DOE!!!1!!!11!!" read what we say next.  If you trade James Neal it can't be for some draft picks and some degenerate prospect.  The only way we trade James Neal is if you are getting an established scoring winger, like a Phil Kessel, in return.  That is the only way.  The 209584634986406 offensive zone penalties and the stupid, suspendable hits have made it easy for us to be ok with trading James Neal.  But like we said.  As long as it's for an established scoring winger.  Oh.  And get Crosby and F ing winger.  Like Mark Madden said.  Sid has only played with a World Class Winger once.  And that was for 3 months when the Pens got Hossa.  

4. Utilize Your Young Talent.  I know.  Sounds like a foreign concept right?  But the Pens need to utilize their young talent better.  Something Dan Bylsma refused to do.  Or when he did do it and they messed up, the rode press box for a month and a half.  Instead of giving guys like Deryk Engelland, Craig Adams, Joe Vitale, Tanner Glass, and Brian Gibbons reach arounds in between every shift, use guys like Beau Bennett, Robert Bortuzzo and Simon Despres more and use them the right way.  No Beau Bennett on 3rd line LW.  That's not his position.  They only way these young guys are going to get better and develop is by playing them and playing them the right way.  No one is above coaching.  All players need it.  But when one of these guys Fs up and makes a mistake.  Don't sit them at the end of the bench.  Don't make them eat press box nachos for a month and a half.  Play them, correct them, tell them what they need to do to get better and not make the mistake a common thing.  Mistakes happen in hockey.  No one is above it. Let these guys play through their mistakes and get better as players as opposed to getting pissed off.  Don't make these kids the next Alexi Morozov

Which brings us to our final point.

5. Utilize Kris Letang Better.  "Baaaaaaah. But Letang sucks and isn't worth his contract. Herrrrrrrrr derrrrrrrrrrrrrrr"  F.  Off.  Dan Bylsma hasn't used Kris Letang properly at all.  He's not on the power play and forces him to play with a shock collar on so when Letang tries to help the offense Bylsma zaps him and makes him sit in the neutral zone.  Take the damn training wheels off of Kris Letang for the love of God.  The kid is at his best when he can roam freely and chip in offensively.  He's defense isn't perfect but it's solid.  With the right coaching Kris Letang could go back to the form we saw in 2012 and most of 2013.  Use him on the power play.  Use him on the penalty kill.  He is the best D man on your team and has the ability to be one of the best D men in the league.  Use him the right F ing way!

So that's our list of the 5 things the Pens could do to change this bumpy road they are currently on.  You may agree.  You may disagree.  Whatever.  But if your solution here is "Trade Fleury or Trade Letang" well then we'll let our buddy Stone Cold respond to you:

All in all the Pens need change desperately. Change You Can Believe In.  Hopefully it comes sooner rather than later. 

Till next time.

Go Pens







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